California Fun

We went on a family trip with all of my brothers and sisters and their kids and our parents. It was such a fun week! We rented a beach house that was 100 yards away from both the bay and ocean! We played at Lego Land, Sea World, Disney Land and the beach! Great times had by all! Here are just a few of our favorite pictures!

 

 

Maya drove with us to help with the kids in the back seat!

Crashing on the floor at our Aunt and Uncles house in St. George.
 Emme loves having someone to sleep by.

A little movie and headphone time!

Emme is a water girl and always has been! She loves the water and the temperature doesn't seem to bother her. The night we got there we walked down to the bay to SEE the water. Try telling that to a two year old. She quickly ran in the water, and was soon just in her diaper. Silly girl!

On Sunday we went to church. It was an excellent sacrament meeting. After we went to show Emme where we got married. She is also excited to go to the temple in her white dress!

Monday we went to Lego Land. It was fun, but not some where I loved. It didn't have much for Emme and lines were really long. The rides were not super exciting. The kids liked it, but didn't love it.

Day 2 was Sea World. I knew that Emme loved animals but I didn't know she loved them this much. She LOVED Sea World. She sat through the animlas shows without moving, she was so engaged in them. She loved the rides there. It was such a fun day!

We didn't leave the parking lot before she was gone.
No naps = exhausted girl.

A sleepy boy

Day 3: We drove up to Disney Land with my brother and his family. Brandon's sister and her family live there as well so they meet us and spent the day together. We had a great time. Emme loved any ride that involved a boat and seeing the princesses. Although I think she had a great time, I think she was a little young. She enjoyed Sea World more and seeing the animals. She was always asking for the orca's and dolphins.

The rest of the trip is were Beach and Park days!

Emme loved digging in the mud!

 

 

 

 

Our handsome little man hanging at the beach

 

Checking out the water

Watching the boats! Emme loves holding her little brother.

The little kids, missing Madi and Hannah

Crazy cousins...missing Maya, couldn't get her out of the water!

Going for a little ride!

Building sand castle with Madi
 

Family Picture, don't worry Ryder didn't go out without a jacket!


 

I didn't realize until we got home that Brandon was always taking pictures.
He was there the entire time, we just missed him in most of the pictures.
Remember for next time!

Seal Beach

Emme loved using the binoculars, although, I am sure she couldn't see anything.
 She used them all day.

Family Picture, but someone is holding Ryder.

Just Dad and Ryder

 

 

 

Ty loves having a boy cousin, he just needs to get bigger so they can play!

 

One night an adult dinner, with Ryder! What a great Daddy!

 

We snuck out for a bike ride. Rode to the Temple. A beautiful ride!

 

 

 

 

 

 

The journey home was fun. We sang songs, colored, and played games. At one point Emme was coloring beautiful pictures. I turned around to check on them and she decided her face was a good place to color! She was very proud of herself! Thank goodness it was washable marker!

 

 

"No not home, I want the beach" were the words Emme spoke as we pulled onto our street. She loved our trip with her cousins. Two weeks later she still talks about the beach and the animals! I am so grateful for our family. I am grateful for our two wonderful kids that make a trip like this so fun, exciting, and exhausting! It is a trip we will never forget! I am grateful that I have a wonderful relationship with my mom and dad and my siblings. I love that we can all live under one roof for an entire week and not kill each other, but be sad to leave. I have a wonderful life with a wonderful husband, two amazing kids, and am blessed beyond words.

 

4 months

Our little man is 4 months old! He loves his toes and making noises. He is sweet, cuddling, and lovable. He is a big boy, he weighs nearly 19 pounds and is 26.5 inches making him in the 98% for both height and weight! He is wearing all 9 month clothes and some 12 month clothes.

He is making better eye contact and turns when he hears our voices. He likes tummy time and has good extension in his body. He likes to sit up but doesn't really have the ability to do it yet. He gets to start eating food, but we haven't really started. Hopefully soon. We will post that for sure!

We love him more than words can say and are so happy that we get to raise this little guy. Emme loves having a brother and we are excited for all the fun times to come!

Shadows, Tunnels, Songs, and Books

Recently we were putting Emme to bed and she said she was scared and was pointing. We couldn't figure out what she was pointing to. That night we held her tell she fell asleep. Night after night she keep saying scary, scary...until we finally figured out it was shadows that were scary. Brandon spent the next few days and nights explaining shadows and they are not scary. She now goes around talking to shadows, "hi shadow" "shadow you not scary, you funny!"

I need to take a picture of Emme's shadow and put it on here!

We learned her night creates a number of odd looking shadows and have since removed it. It has helped night go more smoothly!

Another one of Emme's favorites is tunnels. As we drive every overpass we drive under Emme shouts out "tunnel" I love driving with her because she is always talking and looking for the next tunnel. Brandon has taught her the difference between cars, trucks, vans, semis. It is very entertaining as we drive down the road!

Tunnels, overpasses...Emme thinks they are all great!

Along with naming all the vehicles singing songs is another car favorite. Over the holidays I had a Christmas songs playing and she fell in love with Rudolph, Frosty, and Jingle Bells. Now that I have pit that cd away it is If Your Happy and You Know It, The Ants Go Marching, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, ABC's and Bingo. I will try to record her singing.

She also loves puzzles. This is a puzzle she does at Grandma Susie's. When she knows she is being recorded she doesn't do them very fast...but she can do this puzzle so fast. It amazes me!

When I travel we face time at night to chat. This last trip she wanted to read books. First I read a book I had with her and then she red to me. I was only able to record. I loved watching it the rest of the trip to see my sweet little girl!

Sorry it is sideways, I can't figure how to flip it! :(

Seven Weeks

Ryder is getting so big! I can't believe how fast he is growing. The other day I went to put on his on an outfit and it wouldn't snap. It was a three month and he is only seven weeks.

6 Month outfit

Then I was doing some work on the couch and he was sitting next to me and I saw him start to roll over. I just watched and sure enough he rolled from his tummy to his back. I was in shock, I moved him back and he did it again, and again, and again. He has only done it a few times since then but he did it probably 15 or so times that night.  It isn't the clearest video, but you get the idea!

 

 

 

He also loves to sit up, with help. He is really strong, he holds his head up and likes to talk to us. He loves when his sister reads him books. It has brought so much joy to our family. We love you little man.

Oh, I feel like a slacker

I so feel like a slacker, I haven't posted in a while, especially pictures of my sweet girl Emme & our little man Ryder. It isn't for lack of pictures or great times. For some reason I often feel overwhelmed when getting ready to write on the blog so I do something else. So this is an apologize, to everyone that uses this to keep up with our family, but mostly to two fabulous people, our birth moms Kayla & Danuell, of our wonderful children.

So here is a video of Emme reading to me on Face Time. I was in California on a business trip and she wanted to read stories...I read some books to her, then she went to get books and started reading to me. It was the best!

A picture of little Ryder at two weeks old, a sneak peak to his photo shoot. I would post more, but this is the only picture I have gotten back so far!

I will work on getting more pictures, I have Halloween of Emme, and of course lots of Christmas with our new addition to our little family.

Here is one of my favorites, Emme loves her brother...

I love my life! We feel so blessed to have two wonderful, healthy, happy kids and a wonderful hubby. Brandon and I love playing them, holding them, singing, reading, and just being a mommy and daddy! I am so grateful two wonderful women that gave us the gift we couldn't give ourselves, a family! We love you guys!

NICU

How can you hurt so much for someone that you've only know a few days? Years ago I don't know that I would have believed that you could love at first sight, but the moment I laid eyes on little Ryder I fell in love.

Adoption is a rollercoaster with many risks, almost all unknown, until you have fallen in love with your child. When Ryder was born he looked like a healthy boy weighing a solid 8lb 7oz. He passed his hearing test, he was doing all the things he should be doing. After a great first few hours with him and his birth mom we headed to the nursery to let him sleep. We thought we might want a couple last nights of sleep...

On Saturday when we arrived we knew something was not quite right. The doctor noticed elevated symptoms that were showing signs of withdrawal. It was pretty early to be showing these signs as they usually show up 48-72 hours after birth, it hadn't even been 24. At first they were going to let us take him out of the nursery...but decided it would be okay.

We had a room where we got to hold and love him. Family got to come see him and most importantly Emme was able to come hold her little brother. She fell in love. It was amazing to see her instant love for him. It is difficult to explain to any two year old what having a brother or sister might be like, but especially when it happens overnight! She held him and quickly became very possessive of him. She wanted to be sitting in the chair holding him, not sitting next to him, but actually holding him. When others attempted to hold him she would cry and say "my Ryder". She loves her little brother.

Ryder awake and read for the RSL game

Emme loving her little brother!

Ryder had a good day, a few tremors, and his muscles were tight be we were hopeful. He was eating really well and so we prayed and hoped that he would be coming home. We watched the RSL soccer game, visited with friends and family, and just loved on Ryder. It was a wonderful day.

About 9 pm we took him back to the nursery so they could monitor him and we could get some sleep. We were really hopeful that we would be bringing him home in the morning or at least by late afternoon.

I hadn't been sleeping well and since it was likely my last chance to get some good sleep I decided to take a sleeping pill. Brandon didn't sleep well and went out on the couch. When I woke up at 4 am (see not sleeping well) I noticed I had a message on my phone. It was from the hospital that they had moved Ryder into the NICU because he had been really agitated and was scoring above a ten.

Tears rolling down my face as I felt completely helpless. We needed and wanted to get to the hospital as soon as possible but it was early. I sent some text looking for someone to help with Emme. We talked to Brandon's dad who was going to meet us at the hospital to give Ryder a blessing.

Side note...we have lived in our house less than a year but have made some great friends and have wonderful neighbors. I am so blessed that I felt comfortable to call neighbors in the very early morning to see if we could bring Emme by. The love and support and willingness to help has meant so much to us. Emme went to Jessica's and my brother left Ogden to come and get her.

Emme loves her cousins so she has been happy spending the last couple days with Ryan's family. Eli would love to adopt Emme, he asks if it is okay to adopt her again. He said we are adopting Ryder so they can adopt Emme! I am glad that she is so happy. Makes it much easier to be here knowing she is well taken care of.

...going back
So Brandon and Steve gave little Ryder a beautiful blessing, I felt an extreme amount of peace but know our little monkey has a long road ahead. It made me reflect on how blessed we are to have the gospel in our lives. To know of the power of the priesthood and power of prayer. To know that our Savior knows our pain and will provide comfort during difficult times.

It makes me so grateful, that for whatever reason, Danuell decided she wanted to deliver in Utah. I can't imagine going through this without family close by in hospitals that are unfamiliar without our support system. For that this is a blessing to be just 30 or so minutes away from the hospital...that is if it would stop snowing!

Ryder is having some test done to see what his withdrawal is from, we are anxious to find out so that the doctors know how to help him be more comfortable. It will also allow us to do some learning about how best to help him after he is home so that he can have the best development possible. I am grateful for nurses, doctors, and medicine. I am grateful that they can help Ryder be comfortable as he begins his little life.

Ryder loves to be held, it is one of the best ways to comfort babies that are withdrawing. I can't complain, holding him for hours on end isn't a bad way to spend my day. He had a pretty good Sunday. Most of the day his scores hovered right about ten. That meant the medicine was working and he was comfortable. He had a rough 1.5 hours right before he was to get another does of meds. They are giving him phenobarbital every 12 hours. They were hopeful this would be enough because he can go home on that. After getting another round at 5:30 Sunday night he calmed down again.

In fact he calmed so much when his grandparents were here it was hard to tell anything was wrong. He was even relaxing his muscles for the first time. They scored him a 12 right before we left and said that if he scored above a 10 one more time they would have to start morphine. We really didn't want his to happen.

At 1:15am we got the phone call that they would have to start morphine because he was scoring in the high teens and had not fallen asleep since we left. Poor little monkey, it just isn't fair that he has to suffer so much so young. I know this will make him strong.

They started morphine and will continue to give him pheno. The morphine happens as needed right now, he had his second does at 4:30am and pheno at 5:30am. When I got to the hospital just before 7 he was sleeping. He has been sleeping since.

It has been really hard for me because I just want to hold him, but I know I can't disturb his sleep. He needs it after being awake all night. As soon as he wakes up I will feed him and hold him. Then he can just sleep in my arms...

Thank you to everyone that has sent us texts, FB posts, called, given us boy clothes, offered to help, and have helped. I never knew how much those things mattered, but being in a hospital room all day is long; especially a dark hospital room with no noise. I told Brandon it was the longest shortest day...I don't know if that makes sense, but that's how it felt. The support is so helpful. It keeps me occupied and gives me strength. It is nice to have others praying for your and your family. Please keep praying for little Ryder. I know he is strong and I can't wait to take him home. Pray for Emme that she will feel loved and be able to handle the changes. Thank you are not adequate words to express our gratitude but it is all I have right now. So thank you and we love you all.

The Twists and Turns of Adoption

First I must say, social media has some amazing benefits. Just moments after posting that we were headed to Florida and were looking for a place to stay we had tons of help. We found a photographer, a place to stay, money to help with food/gas while in Florida, a babysitter, flights offered…we were so humbled by all of the kindness shown to us. Thank you to those of you that shared our status, contacted friends and family. It means so much to have so many people reach out to us.

After spending the next several days figuring out work schedules, packing bags, buying some clothes, getting out car seats, setting up cribs etc. we waited for a phone call that Danuell was going into labor. Day after day we waited, prayed, and waited.

Then the text that surprised us all…Danuell has decided to come to Utah deliver. “What, they will let her fly?” I was confused and worried but excited that we wouldn’t have to travel. When I called Brandon, he was happy, but also a little sad we wouldn’t get a vacation on the beach!

Danuell came with her nephew Billy and arrived on December 5^th about 11:00 pm. She was taken straight to Jordan Valley Hospital.

Friday morning while on a field trip with my little first graders, I got a text that she was moving fast. Anxious and excited I waited, it wasn’t long after that I heard little Ryder had been born. He was born at 9:47 on December 6^th, 2013.  Ryder Gene is 8lb 7oz, 20 inches long. He is a very handsome little guy.

 

Danuell, Ryder, and Us

 

Brandon, Courtney, Danuell, Billy & Ryder

 

 

 

Our handsome little man

 

Family Picture, Emme is in love.

We came to the hospital about 6pm to meet Danuell and baby Ryder. It was the most amazing couple of hours as we sat and talked with Danuell and Billy. Danuell is an amazing women. She told us about her pregnancy with Ryder, he wasn’t always nice, doing lots of kicking in the ribs, punching, and causing her tons of heartburn. She told us more about her growing up years in Florida. She grew up riding 4 wheelers, barrel racing, riding horses, and growing up on the farm. We were amazed by her strength, her attitude, her desire to provide for her little girl, and this little man and make the best for all of them.

I can’t wait to tell Ryder about her strength and her love for him. The more we are around adoption the more I know that adoption is about love. The tremendous amount of love that a birth mom has for a child and their intense desire to provide a better situation for the child to be raised in. We know of the enormous responsibility and privilege we have to care for this little guy.

Danuell doesn’t love Utah, you might even go to say she hates Utah weather so she was anxious to get back to the warm and sunny Florida. She is a trooper, she was discharged Friday night so she could go sleep in a comfy bed… a hotel bed…or at least more comfortable than a hospital bed!

We were so grateful for the couple hours we got to spend with her, Billy, and Ryder. It was a pleasure to get to know her. We left with hugs and tears as she entrusted her sweet little boy into our arms. She gave us something we cannot give ourselves…a family. We love you Danuell and have the most respect for her.

Saturday morning before leaving on her flight she signed the necessary paperwork for us to adopt little Ryder. We are blessed.

 

Sometimes fighting with pictures on blogs isn't worth it! :) These are not in any order!

Grandma and Grandpa K

 

Grandma Susie

Papa Steve